Adolescence: a time of change

Adolescence is a stage of biological, psychological, social and sexual development. It is a vital stage of transition between childhood and adulthood.

Roughly, preadolescence begins between the ages of 9 and 11 and ends around the age of 20.

Why is it a time of change?

From this stage on, the changes become more widespread. On the one hand, it is the moment when adolescents begin to want to relate more among their peers and therefore look for their role models outside the family, that is, in their group of friends, and it is the stage where self-concept is built.

This transition from a more childlike age to adulthood is not an easy path for almost anyone, since countless changes take place and for adolescents it is the time of gradually discovering themselves and, at the same time, accepting themselves.

At the same time, it is the stage of seeking their own autonomy but they also need support from adults.

The adolescent, in their growing struggle, needs to gradually move away from dependence on the closest adults (their parents) and accept themselves and find their own identity.

This constant search leads them to be more rebellious, to reject the imposed norms and the rules generated up to that point, whether family, school or social. It is for this reason that they can often feel misunderstood and consider that they are being treated unfairly.

Physically, the adolescent tries to break away from how they were as small children, from their childhood, and for that reason they sometimes make physical changes, whether in the way they dress, and this sometimes generates little approval from their parents about this.

The parents' experience

We parents sometimes do not understand that our child suddenly changes, and we go through this stage with concern.

We must keep in mind that these changes are normal, and therefore we should not act in an authoritarian or overly permissive way, but rather establish a great deal of dialogue and communication with our child, since the minor still needs a lot of supervision from adults.

Guidance at the family level

• It is good to make agreements at the family level since adolescents are going to want to have more time to meet up with friends and extend their schedules, spend more time on the computer, etc…
• Set limits so that there is good family coexistence and the rules are respected, and with this so that they know what consequences not respecting them has.
• Encourage our child to have these privileges as long as they meet their responsibilities, both at school and within the family
• Dialogue and communicate instead of imposing
• Be proper educational role models and set an example of what we want them to do as well.
• Carrying out joint activities fosters communication and emotional bonds.
• Avoid comparisons with others; we must respect and support them in their decisions, guiding them

We must be patient and accept that it is a time of constant change that we all have to go through.